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This Has Been A Monday - Warren Ellis [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Warren Ellis

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This Has Been A Monday [Feb. 28th, 2011|02:48 pm]
Warren Ellis

I left for Berlin Friday.  On Saturday, a water pipe in the bathroom, upstairs, sprung a leak, which spread downstairs to soak the washing machine and tumbledryer.

I get home Sunday night and put the chickens away.  We have three rescued ex-battery hens.  Came from the British Hen Welfare Trust, whom I recommend.  A gift from me to Niki, who loves them.  I notice one of them isn’t sleeping with the others as usual, but standing alone on the other side of the coop.  I make a note.

And go back to my office.  Longtime readers will know that I have a terminal allergy to house dust.  My family, however, seems never to remember this.  Lots of dusty boxes and books got moved into my office when the leak sprang.

Today is Niki’s birthday.  It’s also the anniversary of my Dad’s funeral.  I’m having a monster allergy attack, the second really bad one in as many months.  This afternoon, the chicken stops eating and drinking, and flops on the ground.  By 615, we’re at the vet with the damned bird, who tells us it’s a respiratory infection, gives her a shot and tells us it’s 50/50 whether she’ll see the morning.  He gives us a mix to give her, telling us to syringe it into her through a straw.  You think we can find anyone who’ll sell us straws?  Juice carton straws are too sharp, and we can’t even find a Bic pen to disassemble.  So we syringe it right into her beak and hope it goes down the right hole.

Then the chicken shits all over me.

Which at least indicates the antibiotic shot is working.

I’m about done with Monday now.

(Automatically crossposted from warrenellis.com. Feel free to comment here or at my message board Whitechapel. If anything in this post looks weird, it's because LJ is run on steampipes and rubber bands -- please click through to the main site.)
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: disgruntledgrrl
2011-02-28 09:51 pm (UTC)

Wow.

Just .. wow. Avoid elevators while yer at this, ok?
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[User Picture]From: djinnthespazz
2011-02-28 09:54 pm (UTC)
you hate dogs why?
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[User Picture]From: aflaminghalo
2011-02-28 09:59 pm (UTC)
According to lore, it's good luck if a bird shits on you. So that's something for your birthday :)
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[User Picture]From: kittydesade
2011-02-28 10:02 pm (UTC)
I'll trade you the chicken shit for the funnel cloud.
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[User Picture]From: matociquala
2011-02-28 10:13 pm (UTC)
Okay, that's officially a crappy day.

(Sorry... sorry...)

(Sorta)
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[User Picture]From: funranium
2011-02-28 10:35 pm (UTC)
Gah. Sorry to have added to the Monday pile. May it come through properly.
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[User Picture]From: sixswordsamurai
2011-02-28 11:36 pm (UTC)
Sorry you're having such a bad day. Hopefully tomorrow is better.
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(Deleted comment)
[User Picture]From: jettcat
2011-03-01 02:18 am (UTC)
I have had a Monday today as well.
It began wrong as I walked up to the office holding my work cell and iPod and sudden I wasn't walking, but facedown on the asphalt wondering how the hell that happened so quick.

I now have road rash on my right knee, right elbow and left wrist. The rest of me spent the day complaining whilst I got to pretend to be cheerful for tourists...

There must be something fucking contagious about Monday!
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[User Picture]From: glych
2011-03-01 05:23 am (UTC)
I rarely reply to your posts (what with the whole of the internet following your antics and antidotes with what seems crazed reverence at times)... but, wow, Warren...

I'd have to say that is a pretty bad day. Sorry to hear that such a special remembrance as your father's funeral should be marked by such absurd tribulations as sick birds and allergic reactions. I hope you turned that pain into awesomeness in your writing.

Hope tomorrow is better for you.
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[User Picture]From: entropicdude
2011-03-01 06:54 am (UTC)
Fucking Mondays. I never did like them.

Here's to tomorrow, right?
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[User Picture]From: fr0w
2011-03-01 07:23 am (UTC)
don't breathe.. problem solved.
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