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I Have Voted. I Have Also Drunk This. - Warren Ellis [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Warren Ellis

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I Have Voted. I Have Also Drunk This. [May. 5th, 2011|10:48 am]
Warren Ellis

On the way back from the polling station, having put my X towards a hopeful instantiation of AV, I stopped off at the lovely Polish shop and bought a can of this:

This prompted the following discussion between myself and Ariana, after I sent her the above photo:

ARIANA:  That is HILARIOUS.  I’ll bet it tastes like bear piss.

ME:  It tastes… different. Weird kind of soft caramel/fruit finish to it.  Bear piss might be delicious.  Oh god

ARIANA:  What?

ME:  BUT WHAT IF BEAR PISS IS DELICIOUS AND NOBODY KNEW

ARIANA:  I am 100% sure someone knew.  You really think there’s no horrible human out there that’s tried bear piss?  I guarantee it’s been done.

ME:  THAT SECRET-KEEPING BASTARD

Clearly, I must never drink this again.

(Automatically crossposted from warrenellis.com. Feel free to comment here or at my message board Whitechapel. If anything in this post looks weird, it's because LJ is run on steampipes and rubber bands -- please click through to the main site.)
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: monksp
2011-05-05 06:09 pm (UTC)
This is quite possibly the best blog post that ever was and ever will be.
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From: ebony14
2011-05-05 06:27 pm (UTC)
Of course, there might be some horrible person that is trying to convince the world that bear piss tastes good and that everyone is drinking it. You wouldn't be that person, would you? I mean, I know you're a bastard, but I didn't know you were THAT kind of bastard.
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: djinnthespazz
2011-05-05 06:37 pm (UTC)
After all, it's the bear's gall bladder that's a (supposed) aphrodisiac...
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[User Picture]From: fatfred
2011-05-05 06:33 pm (UTC)

It's Russian Holy Water.
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[User Picture]From: djinnthespazz
2011-05-05 06:36 pm (UTC)
Make sure it's not bottled in China, then it's just full of melamine.faking.protein...
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[User Picture]From: fatfred
2011-05-05 06:41 pm (UTC)

I want arsenic!
Just like the REAL stuff!
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[User Picture]From: charlycrash
2011-05-05 07:31 pm (UTC)
And twenty minutes later, Ellis turned into a cyber-Karl Marx with a minigun replacing each arm and a gigantic bull cock.
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[User Picture]From: mithras
2011-05-06 05:55 am (UTC)
What would a Warren Ellis branded energy drink do to you?
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[User Picture]From: charlycrash
2011-05-06 08:57 am (UTC)
Big guns, big beard, big cock.. More or less the same thing, I think.
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[User Picture]From: richenza
2011-05-05 08:34 pm (UTC)
Clearly, I must never drink this again.

::looks skeptical::
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[User Picture]From: bluebear2
2011-05-06 06:55 am (UTC)
And look at that illustration. How the guy is holding his huge sword. Not even subtle.

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[User Picture]From: spiritoftherain
2011-05-06 08:39 am (UTC)
Thanks for voting for AV, Mr. Ellis. I really hope Britain wakes up to the horribleness of the FPTP system after seeing what horrors it wrought to my own home country. :(

On the upswing, that is the coolest looking energy drink ever.
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